I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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