Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
