my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize