he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize