It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
