Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
