I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
