I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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