Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
