Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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