I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
