Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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