i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
