I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
