this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
