These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
