Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
