WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Still dying that you shit outside
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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