i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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