I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
