Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
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I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
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I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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