he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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