i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
We have so much sex to catch up on
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
