just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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