Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
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if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
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I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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