She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
