i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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