we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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