they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
two words...techno handjob
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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