Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
