there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
