after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize