Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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