i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
