yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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