I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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