Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
