I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Sober January is a disaster.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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