I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
