i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize