So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
