we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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