just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize