I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize