ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I look better un-naked...
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
