Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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