Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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