My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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