I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
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