So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Randomize
