you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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